- Build stronger foundations while you are still single
One of the reasons we lose ourselves in a relationship Is due to weak boundaries. Loving yourself enables you to know what you want and how you want to feel in your next relationship. Here is how you can love yourself:
- Every day, start by asking yourself what you need. Find out how you can love yourself. The answers you get from these questions will help you love yourself more.
- Pick situations, people and other things in your life that present no harm to you. Give in to your own needs and emotions. Treat yourself kindly and avoid being judgmental of yourself. Listen to your own intuition and set powerful boundaries to guard your energy and time
- Make yourself a priority. Everything else follows. Avoid pleasing other people and make yourself important in your life.
- Know yourself
Your desires, needs, values, dreams, needs. These are things you should have a clear understanding of. This knowledge will always keep you in check during a relationship. Here are a few tips to help you with this.
- List down your needs, grouped into four columns emotional, mental, spiritual and physical
- Indicate your top five to ten priorities, in the order by which they matter.
By doing this you will be able to explore what really is key to you. Always revisit this list as needs change over time, therefore depending on which point of your life you are at.
- Set very strong boundaries
Identify the things in your relationship that you can’t compromise. Things you do not want in your relationship. Let your partner know as well and respect each other’s limit.
These proper boundaries make you feel strong in your coming relationship and prevent you from losing yourself.
- Never forget about your friends
New relationships can consume you to the level that you forget about the outside world. Always spend time with your friends. They will provide you with a totally different perspective.
- Do not forget about your own life
Do not give up the things you love just because you found new love. Maintain your normal routine.
The things you enjoy make you happy, therefore make them a priority and create time for them. don’t lose the hobbies you do with other people apart from your partner.
Doing things by yourself will help you connect with your inner self since no relationship will ever fulfill all your needs. This explains why other things are important in your life as well apart from your relationship. It helps you grow and open new pathways for you.
- Always be your self
Do not allow a relationship to change you into who you are not. Don’t be a football fan to please your boyfriend. Don’t spend the whole day shopping to please your girlfriend. Stay true to yourself and communicate your likes and dislikes to each other
There is no need to consult every decision you make. Make some on your own. Express your opinions and share your thoughts. Always don’t be afraid to tell them what you feel.
- Speak openly
Discuss your feelings and talk about things that are not working. Discuss your likes and dislikes. Honest communications bring people closer. And you can only make the relationship better by knowing and understanding your problems.
- Avoid being over accommodative and over giving
Over giving originates from not seeing your own value. There is a belief that the more we give, the more love we will get back. It never works like that. Instead, it increases resentment, and remember resentness is one of the factors that determine happiness and how long a relationship lasts. Therefore, over giving increases the risk of losing not only the relationship but yourself as well.
Old relationships can give you a lot of information about yourself. Look at the past mistakes and learn from them.
Determine whatever you would not like to repeat. Stay strong and set rules which will guide you once you meet someone.
Two strong individuals who can exist without each other create healthy relationships.
Getting to know yourself can help you bring stronger foundations.
And with this, you will be able to make better choices when it comes to matters of love and avoids heartaches.